Tit for tat

Writer note: "Please see ref#1 before changing multi-station, because it’s important that we maintain our technical accuracy/legitimacy."

My note to writer: "AP style, which we use, trumps how a reference treats 'multistation'; hence the changes that I made."

RTFM if you want to "maintain our technical accuracy/legitimacy."

"How to Slice an Orange"

I just copy edited an article with that title. I had to bring all 28 years of my editing experience to bear on that challenge.

Titles for dummies

"How to Open Schlage A-Series Locks": At the risk of sounding like I have an idiot bias, who doesn't know that you insert the key and turn it. That pretty much was the content of the article.

My article copy editing day begins

First up is a "How-to" article: Under "Things You'll Need" are "Potectuive gloves" and "Googles."

ETA: Excedrin.

Sneaking in?

This photo is my LOL of the day. It's the image used in an article titled "Fixing a Squeaky Stair." The question is, Why does she not want to make a sound?

Neither left nor right

Thanks to one of the few writers who acknowledges that not everyone is right-handed: "Hold the trigger end of the drill in your dominant hand and place your other hand under the front of the drill."

R.I.P.?

When a writer's bio reads like an obit: "After learning electronics in the U.S. Navy in the 1980s, xxx spent a lifetime in the construction industry..."

Maybe it just felt that way.

Sleepediting

You know that horrifying experience of driving in the middle of the night, suddenly waking up after you've fallen asleep for a second or two, and then realizing that you might have just driven through a red traffic light you can see in your rear-view mirror.

In that vein, I just woke up to the sight of the approval screen of an article on how to change the combination on a Master Lock. I need to reread it; I have no recollection of editing it.

Shiver me timbers

First article edited today: "How to Make Your Own Sword Cleaning Kit."

I picked it in honor of Edit Like a Pirate Day.

In a nutshell

One of my fellow copy editors for Demand Media pretty much captures what it's like to edit bad writing:

"Today, I wish my job were to tell writers what's right about their articles, instead of what's wrong. Then I could just say 'Nothing,' and move on."

"John Deere" makes my blacklist

For a while, I was selecting articles about JD products. Many of them were written by a woman who included the following note with each article: "the [yes, lowercase] second reference is my husband who is a service manager at a John Deere dealership with 15 years of experience. He gave me the additional information not found in the manuals."

He did not, however, give her guidance on run-on sentences and the basic rules of punctuation and capitalization. I tried in several notes to her included with my rewrite requests. Fail.

To paraphrase the Soup Nazi, "no more John Deere for you!"

Baby steps

When I send an article back to the writer with a rewrite request, he has four days to resubmit. If he doesn't, the article expires but I still get paid for my work on it.

This is from the writer's bio in an expired article: "[Mr. Expired] is a freelance writer and began writing at the age of 18."

Kind of a late start, wouldn't you say. Apparently he hasn't learned how to rewrite yet.

Lefties left in the lurch

As someone who writes and shoots pool lefty (slightly ambidextrous), I protest in the harshest terms possible the right-handedness bias of many writers.

I always change "hold the xx with your right hand and twist it with your left hand," for example, to "hold the xx with one hand and twist it with the other hand." Just sayin'.

Writer's comments

Article writers often include comments to us copy editors if they feel that doing so would help us in some way.

Another Mr. Obvious (and there are so many) carries on that proud tradition in his writer's comments for "Landscaping for Above Ground Swimming Pools." He wrote, "I just wrote about what I would do when landscaping around a pool."

I don't know how I could have proceeded without that context.

Bad writers will be the death of me.

From an article on troubleshooting a refrigerator: ‎"if the ice maker is not fulfilling both of these responsibilities"

There's nothing worse than an irresponsible ice maker.

Of the 1000s of titles I've copy edited, this one comes the closest to setting up a joke.

"How to Change a Light Bulb on a Harley-Davidson Ceiling Fan" -- A whole lot of rigmarole led up to a big finish: "Unscrew the existing light bulb by rotating it in a counterclockwise motion. Insert the new light bulb by rotating it in a clockwise motion."

Somewhere out there is some poor soul, sitting in the dark, perhaps with his family, whose life will be immeasurably improved by something I'm proud to have worked on.

More title vagueness

"Company Responsibility for Employee Engagement": Matchmaker, matchmaker, make me a match.

Zen and the art of conscience maintenance

I just copy edited an article on Weed Eater strings. It had five sections like this one: "The 0.080-inch, 40-foot replacement Weed Eater strings are available in three different formats: the Tap N’ Go I L.H, part no. 952-701589, which is compatible with Weed Eater models BC 24W and 30B; GTI 19T; HP30SBP; TBC57; XR105; XT 125KT and 125T; and YP140, as well as the Tap N’ Go II Dual Exit, part no. 952-711564, which is compatible with the Weed Eater BC3100."

I've heard tell that some copy editors might not check all the "facts" in this sort of material. Can you imagine being that irresponsible! We're talking weeds here, people.

Sentence du jour

‎"Lightweight rowers must be careful not to gain too much weight otherwise they will find themselves no longer illegible for lightweight competition."

And we all know how painful that can be.

A year and a half of online article editing

From ratting out a coworker (5/13/09, How to Report an Employee Not Keeping His Office Clean) to keeping high blood pressure, etc., at bay (10/20/10, Sodium in Sunflower Seeds), in the words of the Grateful Dead, "Lately it occurs to me what a long, strange trip it's been."