Post-tornado fitness workouts

Has your house been carried away by a tornado? Are you wondering how you can continue your at-home exercise routine? Not to worry.

Many of the online articles I edit have been written with just you, and other victims of Mother Nature's fury, in mind.

You see, the articles indicate that even without your now missing, beautiful floors, you can remain buffed. The exercise instructions include phrases such as "lie on the ground," "sit on the ground," and "kneel on the ground."

So go ahead, pick yourself up, dust yourself off, and throw yourself right back down on the ground. At least you have your health.